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about

In Fitzroy a few year ago a band would busk outside the Bar Open on friday night and they'd do alright until the Bar Open closed and then everyone would come outside and the footpath turned into a grouse dance party.

Happened a few fridays in a row. But on the last friday it happen the jacks come down to break it up. It was about one or two hundred people dancing around and smoking smokes. No drinking really cos the bottle shops were all shut up hours earlier (you know, cos of wat they did to melbourne nightlife in the last decade). So the cops come down and people gave em a sort of "Waa? Wat are you on about? Aint no worry here. get real, dickhead." and the jacks didn't like that. Its not much good embarrassing police - they're surely already embarrassed enough. My mate gave them the gay party animal where they step in to take him down for dancing in the street (??? i know right???) and he pulls the bottom of his shirt under and up so it comes out the neck bit and then he squats a bit, pouts and waves a single finger out at them - you know that mick jagger dance? the naughty school boy, i think its called. Well he gave em the shirt thing and Jagger school boy and they pulled their hands in and stepped back, like "Don't touch the gay or he'll gay all over you, Bill!" or " he'll give you the gay, John, stand back!" then i fell over laughing cos it was a good time all round and they saw people laughing and they didn't like that. And there was a little dude in a cape running around with an eye-eye-eye-fone taking photos - which you know they don't like at all (cos they're already embarrassed, yeah?) and they tried to catch him but he was so slight and nimble he ducked and dodged and slid across the jack's-car bonnet away to safety. He was grouse that little one! So the jacks went up the street and licked their egos and waited for the big riot van to arrive that can evacuate thirty or so people to the drunk tank at once. and when it did they formed up in a straight line with pepper sauce cans in hand and arrested my mate, the gay party animal and the nimble slipper with the camera-fone and a bunch others.

In the midst of the dancing and the good craic i heard some cops say to different people, "look, i know - I'm just doing my job". Clinging to the rhetoric. I guess they were practicing for mayday.

credits

from .​.​.​"this aint england" & the ominous horror, released May 16, 2012

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sweet teens Melbourne, Australia

Australian Folk

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